A Gift At the Turning Point - Thanks Nicholas!
I have been a runner. No, not the kind that gets up in the morning and greets the day with invigorating exercise – the other kind. The kind who leaves when it is too painful to stay. The kind that doesn’t finish things because she is not sure of the outcome. That is the kind of runner I have been.
I’m not sure where in the past 10 years I moved from runner to stayer… but it has been a good change for me. It began, I believe, with the decision not to leave my children as orphans when the dark night of my soul seemed too dangerous to walk through. But I stayed, on the earth, in the house, and doing the best I could with what I had to work with.
There are decisions we make, simple day to day decisions, which seem to mobilize the entire universe on our behalf. Staying with those babies was one of those decisions. I squeaked open the door of willingness and Spirit blew in on a gale of hope. And the GROWTH? Wow! Now I can’t IMAGINE leaving! The best in my life has come from our journey together. My growth may well be God’s answer to my children’s prayers.
Over and over again the opportunity to run comes up in ALL the situations in my life. When I stay AMAZING things follow. New insight, changed beliefs, subtle shifts in my self perception that make it a smidge easier for me to stay with it the next time. To stay the course, learn the lessons, finish the task, make the changes, pursue my dreams…
Hmmmm. Whadaya know!? I’m NOT a runner. Somewhere along my path I’ve become a STAY-ER. Who woulda thought? Big grin!
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